No Disposals

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Jan.Tinetti@parliament.govt.nz

David Geary

THE DEAL

THORNDON STREETCORNER. FOG. DIM LIGHT. A SHADY CHARACTER IN A DARK TRENCHCOAT APPROACHES A NON-DESCRIPT CIVIL SERVANT AS HE WAITS TO CROSS AT THE LIGHTS.

SHADY Hey, brother, got a light?
CIVIL I don’t smoke. And...and neither should you.
SHADY True, true, keep trying to kick’em but they got a grip on me. But, hey, you looking for something...else? Something to get lit?
CIVIL I’m fine.
SHADY I’m selling. I got everything. I got...books.
CIVIL Books?
SHADY Books that’ll rip your head off. From all over the globe. From way back when. I may not look it, but I am...carrying...a library.
CIVIL Look, I’m –
SHADY “Love hits you from behind while you’re waiting for the lights to change”.
CIVIL Are you threatening me?
SHADY No, it’s from one of the books. I got poetry, philosophy, geography, his –
CIVIL Where did you...get...books?
SHADY Secret...but I’ll tell you - Rotary. Rotarians are barbarians. They were giving them away like a lolly scrabble from a fire engine. Picked ‘em up for song. And these books sing songs that’ll —
CIVIL Where are they?
SHADY Inside my coat. On a flashdrive...Yeah, nah, jokes, digital is dead, I got a truck —
CIVIL You know I work for the government. I could –
SHADY You could do the right thing and take these books back? Give them a home?
CIVIL ...Show me.

SHADY SMILES, SHUFFLES OFF. CIVIL FOLLOWS, PULLS A KNIFE.

SHADY Whoa! Thought we were getting friendly?
CIVIL Can’t trust anyone these days. Nah, relax, it’s just a paper knife... okay, it’s not a paper knife. Where are the books?
SHADY Not showing you now. Deal is off.
CIVIL What deal? No money has been —
SHADY Don’t want money. Want you to take these good books back or I’m going to tell everyone where I got ‘em and—
CIVIL But-—like you said, the Rotarians were —
SHADY Nah, they’re just the front, the fall guys, while the real crims deep six the rest in the harbour - using books as ballast, so your leaky boat might float a little higher.
CIVIL What real crims?
SHADY Your boss.
CIVIL What boss?
SHADY You work for the government. Who’s your boss?
CIVIL ... Show me the books.
SHADY You do PR for Internal Affairs, right? You find fifty words for “No”, massage the truth, clean up messes, make memos disappear, and some unlucky folks, too.
CIVIL ...Who are you?
SHADY An avid reader, a concerned citizen. Listen, I got dirt that links your boss to illegal book biffing, and that the order came from the top, from —
CIVIL Show me the books!
SHADY They aren’t here. (FRUSTRATED, CIVIL WALKS AWAY). But I do have a memo, signed by your boss. And I’m meeting Nicky Hagar here, to pass it on if you —
CIVIL Who leaked it?
SHADY You did. You got hacked. Damn that digital revolution! You know if you turn the Beehive upside down, it kind of looks like a sieve.

CIVIL RUNS AT SHADY, HIS KNIFE DRAWN. SHADY SIDESTEPS AND A DELUGE OF BOOKS FALL FROM THE SKY, BURYING CIVIL. SHADY GIVES THUMBS UP TO A TRUCK DRIVER PARKED ON AN OVERPASS ABOVE WITH A TIPPED UP DECK. SHADY TAKES OUT HIS MOBILE.

SHADY Nicky, we still on?...Good. Bring your camera. I got picture for ya.

END

Geary

David Geary writes plays, fiction, TV, film and poetry. He lives in Vancouver and teaches in the Indigenous Film, Documentary and Playwriting programs at Capilano University. His latest short fiction appears in Pūrākau: Māori Myths R etold by Māori Writers.